Thursday, July 31, 2008
Jennifer
Jennifer is a spirited mid-western girl who dreams of the big city. Her goal is to make it to LA one day and be a dancer. She loves her family, her friends, and anything red or gold. By day she is a check out girl at the local Wawa, by night she practices her moves in a full length mirror and a hairbrush microphone. Her favorite food is corn on the cobb. She loves 80's music icons, long walks in the evenings, and dried pig ears. Even though Jennifer might be past her prime for the entertainment industry, she never loses hope. She will keep dancing towards her dreams.
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
When You Are Old
by W. B. Yeats
When you are old and grey and full of sleep,
And nodding by the fire, take down this book,
And slowly read, and dream of the soft look
Your eyes had once, and of their shadows deep;
How many loved your moments of glad grace,
And loved your beauty with love false or true,
But one man loved the pilgrim soul in you,
And loved the sorrows of your changing face;
And bending down beside the glowing bars,
Murmur, a little sadly, how Love fled
And paced upon the mountains overhead
And hid his face amid a crowd of stars.
When you are old and grey and full of sleep,
And nodding by the fire, take down this book,
And slowly read, and dream of the soft look
Your eyes had once, and of their shadows deep;
How many loved your moments of glad grace,
And loved your beauty with love false or true,
But one man loved the pilgrim soul in you,
And loved the sorrows of your changing face;
And bending down beside the glowing bars,
Murmur, a little sadly, how Love fled
And paced upon the mountains overhead
And hid his face amid a crowd of stars.
Saturday, July 26, 2008
Favorite Spam Subject Lines
Found these in my work email's junk box:
Bodyguards Positioned Outside Jolies Vagina
Paris Hilton Tosses Dwarf On The Street
Shocking Video Shows Spongebob And Gay Sex!
Britney Spears To Undergo Sex Change, Enter Politics
Paris Hilton Initially Denies Having Inverted Nipples
...apparently she's no longer denying it.
Bodyguards Positioned Outside Jolies Vagina
Paris Hilton Tosses Dwarf On The Street
Shocking Video Shows Spongebob And Gay Sex!
Britney Spears To Undergo Sex Change, Enter Politics
Paris Hilton Initially Denies Having Inverted Nipples
...apparently she's no longer denying it.
Monday, July 21, 2008
Richwood, WV
I always forget how much I love this town until I take the Sam Black Churchill exit off of interstate 64 and start driving the last hour of my trip. Once a town I visited as often as I could, sometimes spending weeks at a time, I now only get there a few days each year. It's when I start this last leg of my trip, passing though the small towns of Rupert and Netty, with winding mountain roads separating them, that I am instantly reminded of this slower way of life. There's no other way of describing the air other than fresh. It's instantly calming. Once I am there I always wonder why I don't go more often. It's a place that when you pass a stranger they look at you in the eye and smile warmly. When you pass another car on the road they automatically wave because more than likely they know you and your whole family. The only place to go "out" to eat is a Dairy Queen, unless you are going out for a nice dinner in which you would drive 30 miles to go to the Shoney's. And much to my amusement, Saturday nights still consist of cars packed with high school girls driving up and down Main Street and circling around town because that's just what you do for fun.
My mother was raised in this town, but I was not. She was the only one of six children to marry and move away. After I was born, though, the marriage failed and she brought me back with her. My time in Richwood was short lived, however, and as fate would have it I began my fourth year of life back in Virginia with my newly single-parent father. I often wonder how different my life would have been if she had lived to raise me there. Although I love my mother dearly and I would have given anything to have had her in my life so many times growing up, I am glad my life took this path. Sometimes I feel guilty for being thankful of that. I love that town, but I also realize how that town could have made me into a person so different than the one I am today. All I can do is be aware of it all and appreciate both equally.
During this visit I went to my mother's grave alone for the first time. When I found her I knelt down and was very surprised at the immediate emotion that came over me. I told her that I loved her and that I hope she would have been proud of me. I also said that if she was alive today I would take many pictures of her.
The Stranger Project - Stranger # 2
Recently I spent a few days in Richwood, WV, where I visited some family. To say this town is small is an understatement. I looked up some statistics when I got home and in a census taken in 2000, there was a population of just over 2500 people. Even though it's a dwindling city with little hopes of rebuilding itself to the booming lumber and coal town it once was, I still enjoy my time there and it will always have a special place in my life. I find the town and the people so interesting.
Which brings me to my second stranger. I have been a little slow on this project, but hopefully I am improving!
This is Eula Tenney. I first saw Eula as I was driving down one of the two main streets in town. I saw her in the morning, sitting in a chair in front of her apartment. I then drove past her again, about mid-day. Nothing had changed. She still sat there looking around at what little was going on in the street in front of her. I smiled as I drove by. It was a few hours later, in the early evening, when I saw her still there, that I decided to pull over because I had to meet this person. I grabbed my camera and said the only dumb thing that came to mind - which was the obvious: "You've been out here all day." She said she was just enjoying the beautiful weather. We then chatted for a few minutes. She told me her name and that she was married once, but when her husband died she took back her maiden name, Tenney, because she liked it. I told her my name and after a bit of struggling to pronounce it I said "just call me Angie". I told her I had family here and that I loved taking pictures of the town and the people and asked if I could take her picture. She was quite excited and the biggest smile came across her face and she continued to talk and laugh as I talked and took several photos. She then asked if she could see them and said "that's the best picture of me I've seen in a long time!".
(click on photo to view a larger Eula)
Which brings me to my second stranger. I have been a little slow on this project, but hopefully I am improving!
This is Eula Tenney. I first saw Eula as I was driving down one of the two main streets in town. I saw her in the morning, sitting in a chair in front of her apartment. I then drove past her again, about mid-day. Nothing had changed. She still sat there looking around at what little was going on in the street in front of her. I smiled as I drove by. It was a few hours later, in the early evening, when I saw her still there, that I decided to pull over because I had to meet this person. I grabbed my camera and said the only dumb thing that came to mind - which was the obvious: "You've been out here all day." She said she was just enjoying the beautiful weather. We then chatted for a few minutes. She told me her name and that she was married once, but when her husband died she took back her maiden name, Tenney, because she liked it. I told her my name and after a bit of struggling to pronounce it I said "just call me Angie". I told her I had family here and that I loved taking pictures of the town and the people and asked if I could take her picture. She was quite excited and the biggest smile came across her face and she continued to talk and laugh as I talked and took several photos. She then asked if she could see them and said "that's the best picture of me I've seen in a long time!".
(click on photo to view a larger Eula)
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Monday, July 14, 2008
That's How We Roll.
I found this today on Fake Interviews With Real Celebrities and thought it was hysterical. I had to post it here to share with my own nessings readers. You aaand You. That about covers it. Laugh loud!
HOW TO TELL PEOPLE THAT YOU ARE A BILLIONAIRE
WITHOUT SOUNDING OBNOXIOUS
(originally written for McSweeney's)
1. Excuse me, but did you know that I am a billionaire? Well, I am. Nice wheelchair, asshole.
2. Pardon me, but did you drop this wallet? Oh, no, wait. I dropped it. I guess because it was so full of money. (Sigh.) Billions of dollars, in fact. Come back here or I'll hire someone to kill you.
3. My, what a cute baby. I have a baby at home made entirely out of one-hundred-dollar bills. Why do you think Jesus loves me so much? Is it because I am a billionaire?
4. What nice weather we're having. I enjoy the rain. I also enjoy inviting a bunch of orphans over to my house and telling them that I am going to adopt them. Then, at the end of the day, I gather them around me and, after pausing to puff on my pipe, I say, "Just kidding, jerks." I am a billionaire.
5. Do you know what a billion dollars looks like? I guess not, because you are blind. I'm sleeping with your wife.
HOW TO TELL PEOPLE THAT YOU ARE A BILLIONAIRE
WITHOUT SOUNDING OBNOXIOUS
(originally written for McSweeney's)
1. Excuse me, but did you know that I am a billionaire? Well, I am. Nice wheelchair, asshole.
2. Pardon me, but did you drop this wallet? Oh, no, wait. I dropped it. I guess because it was so full of money. (Sigh.) Billions of dollars, in fact. Come back here or I'll hire someone to kill you.
3. My, what a cute baby. I have a baby at home made entirely out of one-hundred-dollar bills. Why do you think Jesus loves me so much? Is it because I am a billionaire?
4. What nice weather we're having. I enjoy the rain. I also enjoy inviting a bunch of orphans over to my house and telling them that I am going to adopt them. Then, at the end of the day, I gather them around me and, after pausing to puff on my pipe, I say, "Just kidding, jerks." I am a billionaire.
5. Do you know what a billion dollars looks like? I guess not, because you are blind. I'm sleeping with your wife.
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
My Core
Friends come and go, but good friends you hold on to.
(Pharse also available stitched on a pillow - please contact me for details)
Jessica P.
She's a wild child turned wife and mother but hasn't lost that edge that attracted me to her over 3 years ago. She's a more talented artist than she gives herself credit for. The good and the bad: she approaches both in her life with passion. She is probably the loudest person in my cheering section and her support of all areas of my life help keep me going. So when this crazy, wild, passionate, spontaneous girl says "I reorganized my coupons this morning", I can't help but love her even more.
Jessica L.
Never one to see things in just black and white. Even after all of the things I've confided in her, she has never judged me. And trust me, I've thrown some doozies at her! Her intelligence, dedication, and composure are all strong characteristics of hers that have influenced me greatly. Our lifestyles have always been so different yet we fit together like sisters. She's the yin to my yang.
Lynsey
By far one of the most loyal people I've ever met, if she loves you then she'll be there forever. You can trust her and walk away -- never having to doubt giving her that trust. She's strong and independent on the outside, yet kind and gentle underneath. I admire her for challenging her beliefs, her growth, and for not settling - because not just any man deserves what she has to offer.
David
I could talk about the obvious things that make him so easy to like, but it's the obvious that makes him a friend of so many. It is what's beyond the surface that makes him so easy to love. I admire him for having the courage to be untraditional in his path and to keep pushing forward while keeping his integrity. Where most people don't care or are too lazy, he sees every situation as a place to meet someone and learn something about them – because you never know what amazing things could be hiding behind the most overlooked person. It's the times I've been with him that I've felt the most invigorated. Besides all this, there is no one I'd rather be stranded on a deserted island with…because of the obvious.
Sharon
If I had a twin sister that was separated from me at birth and raised by another family that lived right up the street I'm convinced it would be Sharon. From our tastes in décor, hobbies, opinions, and especially humor, we are always in agreement. Even though I've known this girl since I was a child, it's been wonderful having her as someone I call a close friend the past two years. She is conscientious, thoughtful, straightforward and honest. With her, what you see is what you get and being around that is always refreshing.
(Pharse also available stitched on a pillow - please contact me for details)
Jessica P.
She's a wild child turned wife and mother but hasn't lost that edge that attracted me to her over 3 years ago. She's a more talented artist than she gives herself credit for. The good and the bad: she approaches both in her life with passion. She is probably the loudest person in my cheering section and her support of all areas of my life help keep me going. So when this crazy, wild, passionate, spontaneous girl says "I reorganized my coupons this morning", I can't help but love her even more.
Jessica L.
Never one to see things in just black and white. Even after all of the things I've confided in her, she has never judged me. And trust me, I've thrown some doozies at her! Her intelligence, dedication, and composure are all strong characteristics of hers that have influenced me greatly. Our lifestyles have always been so different yet we fit together like sisters. She's the yin to my yang.
Lynsey
By far one of the most loyal people I've ever met, if she loves you then she'll be there forever. You can trust her and walk away -- never having to doubt giving her that trust. She's strong and independent on the outside, yet kind and gentle underneath. I admire her for challenging her beliefs, her growth, and for not settling - because not just any man deserves what she has to offer.
David
I could talk about the obvious things that make him so easy to like, but it's the obvious that makes him a friend of so many. It is what's beyond the surface that makes him so easy to love. I admire him for having the courage to be untraditional in his path and to keep pushing forward while keeping his integrity. Where most people don't care or are too lazy, he sees every situation as a place to meet someone and learn something about them – because you never know what amazing things could be hiding behind the most overlooked person. It's the times I've been with him that I've felt the most invigorated. Besides all this, there is no one I'd rather be stranded on a deserted island with…because of the obvious.
Sharon
If I had a twin sister that was separated from me at birth and raised by another family that lived right up the street I'm convinced it would be Sharon. From our tastes in décor, hobbies, opinions, and especially humor, we are always in agreement. Even though I've known this girl since I was a child, it's been wonderful having her as someone I call a close friend the past two years. She is conscientious, thoughtful, straightforward and honest. With her, what you see is what you get and being around that is always refreshing.
Saturday, July 5, 2008
Something To Remember You By
This is my nephew Lewis and his girlfriend Elizabeth. Lewis graduated from high school last month and is leaving to join the military next week.
It seems like only yesterday that he was eight years old running around his mother's and my apartment entertaining us with dance moves from his latest school recital.
Now here he is, 18, about to face the world, and he's in love. In a few days he will leave his home. He will also have to leave this love.
Only time will tell if Lewis and Elizabeth will stay together, but for now I hope this photograph serves as something they can hold on to when they can't hold each other.
Friday, July 4, 2008
ABDC - Episode Two & Three
I got a little behind on my CREWS so I'm combining episodes two & three this week:
Episode Two.
I started this whole posting about America's Best Dance Crew with the intent of making fun of a lot of things...but it is not easy to do that when SUPER CR3W is so damn wonderful! As you are reading this I am texting 1 to the number 2214 even though nothing is live right now and no one is taking votes. I'm just doing it.
but I digress.
Who let the serial killer on the show?
Doesn't Mtv do criminal background checks?
I am happy to see that lil' Mama is receiving my hate mail and starting to deliver crits with a little more personal views.
In this episode she told A.S.S.I.D. that because they are so passionate and since the beat was so smooth that they didn't take the time out to ROT IT. Her advice is to meditate your body.
Pleaes, A.S.S.I.D., take this crucial advice from a woman who ROTS IT when she coordinates her nail polish with her duck bill.
HI LADIES.
After Sass Times Seven preformed an identical routine to a Britney Spears video and after I jammed a fork in my eye, JC told them that tonight they finally "showed up" for the first time...only to be kicked off the show after the commercial break was over.
It was really sad. And by sad I mean FINALLY.
Rumor has it that the two blonds will be JC's background hot girls in episode 7.
Episode Three.
Lil Mama has gone off her meds.
Who knew once she started speaking for herself that evil words of pure hate would come out? I didn't! Please go back to the time when you were paraphrasing Shane and I was not crying in the fetal position.
That's it. Super Cr3w is my favorite. Is it possible to develop a crush because of a flair? Well I just did.
Two things:
ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS and WHERE CAN I GET ONE?
I have to admit I was glad the blonds made another appearance in the JC gallery of hot background chicks. Honestly, they're just easier to see.
Another thing that is funny to me is that these kids will get out there and do something so COOL and then when they're asked to stand in front of the camera and smile for 2 seconds they do this.
I'm just sayin.
This week the crews had to visually display the title of their song. They all did a great job. One of my favorites was Fanny Pack being Toy Soldiers.
The elimination dance off this week was between Xtreme Dance Force and Phresh Select.
Nonononono nooo nono NO pull them back up PULLTHEMBACKUP!no nooo nonononNOnono!
Phresh Selected LOVE.
I knew Phresh Select would win this one so I wasn't sweatin' it. During the pause after Mario said "and the crew that will be here another week is....." I found time to balance my checkbook and get an oil change.
I returned home just in time to see Xtreme Dance Force say their goodbyes.
In this photo serial killer dude is imagining Mario's foot in a jar in his refriderator...
Until next week...Happy Fourth of July to you, to America, and to their best dance crews.
and you too, JC.
Episode Two.
I started this whole posting about America's Best Dance Crew with the intent of making fun of a lot of things...but it is not easy to do that when SUPER CR3W is so damn wonderful! As you are reading this I am texting 1 to the number 2214 even though nothing is live right now and no one is taking votes. I'm just doing it.
but I digress.
Who let the serial killer on the show?
Doesn't Mtv do criminal background checks?
I am happy to see that lil' Mama is receiving my hate mail and starting to deliver crits with a little more personal views.
In this episode she told A.S.S.I.D. that because they are so passionate and since the beat was so smooth that they didn't take the time out to ROT IT. Her advice is to meditate your body.
Pleaes, A.S.S.I.D., take this crucial advice from a woman who ROTS IT when she coordinates her nail polish with her duck bill.
HI LADIES.
After Sass Times Seven preformed an identical routine to a Britney Spears video and after I jammed a fork in my eye, JC told them that tonight they finally "showed up" for the first time...only to be kicked off the show after the commercial break was over.
It was really sad. And by sad I mean FINALLY.
Rumor has it that the two blonds will be JC's background hot girls in episode 7.
Episode Three.
Lil Mama has gone off her meds.
Who knew once she started speaking for herself that evil words of pure hate would come out? I didn't! Please go back to the time when you were paraphrasing Shane and I was not crying in the fetal position.
That's it. Super Cr3w is my favorite. Is it possible to develop a crush because of a flair? Well I just did.
Two things:
ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS and WHERE CAN I GET ONE?
I have to admit I was glad the blonds made another appearance in the JC gallery of hot background chicks. Honestly, they're just easier to see.
Another thing that is funny to me is that these kids will get out there and do something so COOL and then when they're asked to stand in front of the camera and smile for 2 seconds they do this.
I'm just sayin.
This week the crews had to visually display the title of their song. They all did a great job. One of my favorites was Fanny Pack being Toy Soldiers.
The elimination dance off this week was between Xtreme Dance Force and Phresh Select.
Nonononono nooo nono NO pull them back up PULLTHEMBACKUP!no nooo nonononNOnono!
Phresh Selected LOVE.
I knew Phresh Select would win this one so I wasn't sweatin' it. During the pause after Mario said "and the crew that will be here another week is....." I found time to balance my checkbook and get an oil change.
I returned home just in time to see Xtreme Dance Force say their goodbyes.
In this photo serial killer dude is imagining Mario's foot in a jar in his refriderator...
Until next week...Happy Fourth of July to you, to America, and to their best dance crews.
and you too, JC.
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Who All Seen The Leprechaun Say Yeah!
Every second of this video is magnificent. Especially:
"could be a crack head...that got a hold to the wrong stuff!....and it told him to get up in the tree...and play a leprechaun!"
(found on dooce)
**UPDATE**
I have solved the mystery of the Leprechaun in the tree! It was just Jason Mraz!
"could be a crack head...that got a hold to the wrong stuff!....and it told him to get up in the tree...and play a leprechaun!"
(found on dooce)
**UPDATE**
I have solved the mystery of the Leprechaun in the tree! It was just Jason Mraz!
How To
How to annoy me
Chew with your mouth open.
If you do this when I'm around I probably won't make a big deal about it on the outside. (It's not like you're stabbing kittens in the heart right in front of me. If that were the case I would have to mention my distaste – at least by the 3rd or 4th one.) Besides, if you are doing this then we won't be hanging out with each other long enough to have many meals in the future.
Lack common sense.
You wrote on the dry erase board with a sharpie. Really? Do you not know the difference?
Give me only two packets of hot sauce with my tacos.
You know and I know that they put crack in the hot sauce so give me more than 2 packets, please. Mama needs her crack!
Tickle me.
Yes, I realize that I am laughing, but I'm not REALLY laughing. Not in my heart. Can you not tell that between laughs and desperate gasps of air I'm pleading for mercy? You sick tickling monster.
How to enchant me
Call me up and tell me that you've named someone in your Zumba class "Teabo Angie" because they remind you of me.
Stay up all night playing YouTube wars with me and win every time.
Be willing to do whatever it takes for me to get the shot. Even when that means submersion in a lake in the middle of October.
Be comfortable enough with me to not be funny.
Be absolutely random.
Chew with your mouth open.
If you do this when I'm around I probably won't make a big deal about it on the outside. (It's not like you're stabbing kittens in the heart right in front of me. If that were the case I would have to mention my distaste – at least by the 3rd or 4th one.) Besides, if you are doing this then we won't be hanging out with each other long enough to have many meals in the future.
Lack common sense.
You wrote on the dry erase board with a sharpie. Really? Do you not know the difference?
Give me only two packets of hot sauce with my tacos.
You know and I know that they put crack in the hot sauce so give me more than 2 packets, please. Mama needs her crack!
Tickle me.
Yes, I realize that I am laughing, but I'm not REALLY laughing. Not in my heart. Can you not tell that between laughs and desperate gasps of air I'm pleading for mercy? You sick tickling monster.
How to enchant me
Call me up and tell me that you've named someone in your Zumba class "Teabo Angie" because they remind you of me.
Stay up all night playing YouTube wars with me and win every time.
Be willing to do whatever it takes for me to get the shot. Even when that means submersion in a lake in the middle of October.
Be comfortable enough with me to not be funny.
Be absolutely random.
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
Mid-Year Resolutions
This past January, I made one new year resolution... and I pretty much blew it. My New Year's Resolution was to learn Spanish. Maybe it was a tall request for someone with barely the time to even attend a class once a week, but I was determined to do it after spending 5 days in this place:
with these people:
I was in love with it all.
Maybe that resolution hasn't yet happened, but it WILL happen. Even if it has to wait until I am living in a Spanish speaking country.
So here it is July 1st. Six months have passed since I said hello to 2008. Seis entire months have passed since 2008 said "Yo. Sup, ang. You ready for me? Good. Cause here I come, bi-otch!"
Alright, the year did not speak to me. But if it did it would probably come back today and say "You said you were ready for me. What happened?"
Once again I've failed.
SO HERE IT IS JULY FIRST. The sun has set on the day and I am proclaiming my mid-year resolutions. In place of one big resolution (we see how well I do with those) I am going to make a list of small resolutions. Why wait for next year? If I fail a hundred times then I will try again a hundred and one.
My Mid-Year Resolutions:
1. Find a job that I LOVE.
2. Stop apologizing so much.
3. Spend more time with my Grandmother.
4. Throw myself into the photo project I've had in my head for over a year now but haven't talked about out loud to anyone.
5. Keep writing this blog and not caring if anybody reads it!
6. Stop being "one of the guys" so much and expect to be treated more like the girl I know I am. (When a gentleman opens a car door for you and you don't even RECOGNIZE what he's doing - that's a sign that there's a small problem.)
7. Be less selfish and show more appreciation for my friends.
8. Rent a booth at a local fair and sell my photos.
9. Buy a wide lens! (the one resolution to purchase!)
10. Don't regret any choice I've made, any path I've taken, or ever wearing my heart out on my sleeve. (the hardest resolution) And remember that although I often feel alone - I am surrounded by love.
with these people:
I was in love with it all.
Maybe that resolution hasn't yet happened, but it WILL happen. Even if it has to wait until I am living in a Spanish speaking country.
So here it is July 1st. Six months have passed since I said hello to 2008. Seis entire months have passed since 2008 said "Yo. Sup, ang. You ready for me? Good. Cause here I come, bi-otch!"
Alright, the year did not speak to me. But if it did it would probably come back today and say "You said you were ready for me. What happened?"
Once again I've failed.
SO HERE IT IS JULY FIRST. The sun has set on the day and I am proclaiming my mid-year resolutions. In place of one big resolution (we see how well I do with those) I am going to make a list of small resolutions. Why wait for next year? If I fail a hundred times then I will try again a hundred and one.
My Mid-Year Resolutions:
1. Find a job that I LOVE.
2. Stop apologizing so much.
3. Spend more time with my Grandmother.
4. Throw myself into the photo project I've had in my head for over a year now but haven't talked about out loud to anyone.
5. Keep writing this blog and not caring if anybody reads it!
6. Stop being "one of the guys" so much and expect to be treated more like the girl I know I am. (When a gentleman opens a car door for you and you don't even RECOGNIZE what he's doing - that's a sign that there's a small problem.)
7. Be less selfish and show more appreciation for my friends.
8. Rent a booth at a local fair and sell my photos.
9. Buy a wide lens! (the one resolution to purchase!)
10. Don't regret any choice I've made, any path I've taken, or ever wearing my heart out on my sleeve. (the hardest resolution) And remember that although I often feel alone - I am surrounded by love.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
